Who Am I?

"You've heard it said that no decision is a decision. Hidden within indecisiveness is the goal of always being right. As long as we don't know what we want, we will never be wrong, never make a mistake, and hence we will never be disappointed. We have been programmed since childhood not to make mistakes. By being indecisive we can remain a child. The moment we decide to take charge our lives is the moment we really leave home. Once we start making decisions for ourselves, we are on our own."It is safer not to make decisions, to be passive, childish and to take our cue from others. Making a decision always reveals something about you. Making a decision tells people who you are. And so, making a decision is essentially divulging a great secret. If your purpose in life is not to reveal who you are, then you will always remain undecided."Another reason for indecisiveness is the fear that we may have to give up something. For example, if you want to take a vacation to Hawaii, it means you have to give up going to the Bahamas at the very same time. To choose one goal means you may have to give up others. If you decide on a certain way, it means you may have to give up other paths. It means you can’t be everything, do everything and have everything at the same time. It means you can't please everybody. When you make a choice, you run the risk of rejecting the values of certain people. They may see you, as you really are, not the way they want you to be. In other words, not like them. So by doing nothing, you may be able to retain the love and approval of different people whose values contradict each other, and your indecisiveness helps you to avoid trying to reconcile situations that can't possibly be reconciled."FROM Robert Anthony's book "Advanced Formula for Total Success" (now called "Beyond Positive Thinking"). Chapter 5 - titled "Write Your Own Script"

This is from the Just for Today Blog. It fits me perfectly! I will start at the top. "Hidden within indecisiveness is the goal of always being right. As long as we don't know what we want, we will never be wrong, never make a mistake, and hence we will never be disappointed. " I have a tough time making decisions. About anything! I let everyone make my decisions for me. It's easier that way. Or so I thought. And now that's why I'm stuck in my current situation. This is a lifelong pattern for me. As long as I can remember I've avoided making decisions - I grew up with Mom making them for me and I guess I never learned how to do it myself. Either that or when I did make them for myself they were "wrong" (probably according to my Mom anyway) and I just wanted to please everyone. Because if I please everyone then everyone loves me. And I needed to know that I was loved. A counselor my husband and I were seeing once asked me about this...he said what difference would it make if I made a bad decision? His suggestion was let me go buy furniture that I want...if it's pink and hideous, so what. My problem is I don't know what I want. I think I do, but then the thoughts start going through my head of what others will think, or will this "match" anything, or that's a lot of money to spend so you better make sure that's what you want. Obviously I need to work on this. I need to step out and make a decision - right or wrong - of course I'll start small. Hmmm, what should I make for dinner?